I went down to Ground Zero tonight, not really knowing what to expect, but knowing I should go. I took the E train to get there. Everyone else seemed to be going the opposite direction. I looked up at the signs and realized they all still said "Take E to World Trade Center". It really got to me that people got on that train every day to go to work. Some still do, but so many don't. Not anymore. I kept getting eerie vibes that I shouldn't be going, that it was wrong. The train ran really late. The train was re-routed to another line. Finally got on the train. It hit me again when I realized "World Trade Center" was the very last stop. Got off the train. It was too quiet when I got up to the street. Everything was a little darker, a little more looming. Saw plans for the new "Freedom Tower". Saw the 30 floors that have already been built of the "Freedom Tower". My friend looked at it and simply said: "I love America". I couldn't respond. Walked around. Saw those big lights up close. Went to the memorial. There were firefighters in uniform all over, people placing flowers, people just milling around, people lighting candles. I couldn't do anything but stand there, stare.
It's been NINE years. But it's still a reality here. I noticed a young man, sharply dressed, subtly placing a note from his pocket onto the fence surrounding the site. It was a powerful moment. Since last night, when I first saw the lights, I've been trying to process what it means. What WHAT means? I don't have a clue. I've said it before, and I'll say it again. It's damn confusing. Isn't everything.
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